idea: so many crimes, so little time, from the perspective of a cat

The Calculus of the Nap

The world is vast, a tapestry of sunlit dust,
Where shadows stretch and silent moments rust.
I sit upon the velvet throne of the chair,
A sovereign ruler breathing gentle air.
And yet, the grand equation I must face,
Is etched upon my feline, languid space:
So many crimes, so little time to mend,
A cosmic ledger that will never end.

The crime began with the unattended bowl,
A slow betrayal taking its harsh toll.
The empty dish, a desolate decree,
A hunger vast that mocks the memory
Of full bounty promised by human hands—
A thousand feasts I misunderstood and banned.
These are the offenses against my peace,
The gentle suffering that will not cease.

Then comes the crime of the sunbeam theft,
Where golden rays are cruelly deflected.
I stretch and crave the patch upon the floor,
A sacred right I fight for evermore.
To be denied the warmth, the perfect heat,
Is to endure a slow, agonizing feat.
The angles wrong, the shadow’s cruel design,
An injustice framed in pale, weak shine.

And oh, the crimes of the hurried stride,
Where swift decisions swiftly coincide.
The endless calls for doors to be closed tight,
The frantic chase that steals away the light.
I watch the mortal creatures rush and run,
Their frantic lives beneath a setting sun,
While I remain, in perfect, weighted grace,
A judge observing time and empty space.

For me, time is measured by the slow arc
Of morning stretch and the softest dark.
It is the silent ritual of sleep,
The sacred promises I choose to keep.
But human clocks are frantic, loud, and fast,
They calculate the moments that have passed;
They count the minutes spilled and spent in toil,
Ignoring this profound, unyielding soil.

So much injustice stacked upon the floor,
A lifetime’s worth of want and empty lore,
All confined within these brief spans we know—
The crimes of hunger, letting feelings grow.
And all this happens with a languid sigh:
So many crimes, so little time to try.
I wait, I judge, I blink my amber gaze,
A king observing through the hazy maze.